Tag Archives: relationships

Living Without Regret

The question of what impact do I want my life to have today and in the future often occurs to me. When I ask myself this question it allows me to check back in on whether I’m living purposely in that day or not. The above video is a great  reminder of living with this spirit.

I find there is the potential otherwise to waste  time on things that may become of far  lesser importance when were to look back on them. In this way I can aim to be living in each moment and there for those who are around me. In essence it is a sense of coming from a point of what really matters most and then living from there.

In the below guardian article titled the 5 regrets of the dying, Bronnie Ware an Australian nurse documented the top 5 regrets of patients in their last days. The top 5 she recorded were;

1.) I wish I had the courage to live true to myself not to what others expected of me.

2.) I wish I hadn’t worked so hard

3.) I wish I had the courage to express my feelings

4.) I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends

5.) I wish I had let myself be happier

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying/print

Knowing these regrets of the dying can really get us to reflect on living a full life where we do not waste our time on things that ultimately don’t matter so much. For all of us it can be slightly different in what we perceive to be most valuable, asking the question what will we want to leave behind is a really good way to understand these, what will be and is most important now? Is it money, the people in your life, the experiences you have? What kind of legacy do you want to leave behind. By  knowing the answer to these questions  we can then proceed to live as much of our days from these values. Some questions I find good for reflecting on this are;

  • How do you want to be remembered?
  • What do you want to leave behind?
  • How can you create the most value today?

If we live from this place in every moment we can be sure to be on purpose, living without regret and knowing  we’ve made the most difference possible with our lives ❤

Live from the  heart

Live from the heart in all you do

Live  from the heart as though everyday could be your last

Valuing all that matters most

Knowing you do your best in all you pursue

Most of all know you wasted nothing,

That in every moment you gave your everything

~ M. L Adams

Where you go from here

We can choose in any moment
To hold on or let go,
To give or to take;
Or to allow in defeat

We can choose in any moment,
Which way we want to go
In how to turn something around,
In what to say and what to sow

It is these choices now,
That give the power that we have
The way to shape our life from here,
A way to always come back

So no matter what, when or where,
You always have a choice in your hands,
Do you focus and move forward,
Or give in and fall back?

~ M.L Adams

A Throwaway Culture for Relationships?

Throwaway culture

Our world is becoming more fast paced by the minute and it seems along with the consumerist culture of products and pleasures, that people and relationships are being treated in this way more frequently too. In dating culture it has become very obvious, from how we can pick and choose someone based upon their appearance alone to how many just wont stick around with someone any more if they don’t quiet meet the checklist.

In some ways I think this may be a positive but it can also go too far. It can occur in friendships as well as relationships, I’ve recently had personal experience of this with such people and situations where after making one mistake or doing one thing that doesn’t meet their needs alone, they will just drop you like a ton of weight.

It is understandable if situations occur where someone goes too far, we need to be clear with them to not do the same again. However we are all only human and where is the depth and realness when people are marked off a checklist and treat like a consumer product. The deepest and best relationships come when we truly see the person and love and accept them just the same. This is how we can be with family and those closest to us, to have truly valuable lasting real-ationships, we need to see others as their whole self too. Unless of course we are happy with a surface relationship that has no passion, depth or bond.

Maybe products today are not made to last but as people we are not made to be thrown away, we are here to love and be loved as a whole and as we are. This is the kind of relationships I now seek, ones that are real, where others are themselves and I can be too. Because of this I know I too have to be vulnerable and drop my checklist, choosing to see anyone I know and meet as whole person worthy of love and acceptance no matter what.

As for the actual products in my life I always try to keep them as long as I can and recycle (but I am not so attached to them). The people that are in and come into our lives are not material objects but feeling beings, so in knowing this myself I choose to be open and receptive to this, to all the beauty in each person and not just someone who is there to tick my list. I would hope in this I can bring far more to others and that the relationships in my life will be far more real and enriching. As for the consumerists I’ll let them continue shopping 🙂

I’m curious to hear your thoughts on this too, have any of you experienced this or is it something you’ve noticed happening? Do you think it can be a positive at all or purely a negative for our relationships and in how we treat people?

Thank you for all your realness, loving and feedback as always 🙂